today got back darn results.
dunno to be happy or to be sad sia,
happy is no supp papers which is always a good thing but having shitty grades isnt exactly appealing either

after how many nights i sacrificed to study this exam through, i still ended up like this, dont know if it was really worth putting in so much for it... haiz

then anyways, theres no need to go around announcing your 3.xx + GPA to everyone when you know that there are lesser souls like me around who are poor is such stuff

i'm so beginning to wonder if this really is where i am going to end up in.. =(

its mind wrecking and even more so when i'm buried in neck with stuff
i always wonder to myself whether i would be able to carry out my dreams, my ideals.
but i guess for now, it is but a dream that will yet be achieved, and unlikely to be

maybe its just me
having unrealistic expectations about stuff, always thinking too highly of myself, overrating it to be easy.

i live in a facade,
a dimension outcast from reality
where i pamper myself with my own thoughts
oblivious to things around me
yet there are times when reality knocks on the door

"my reality check bounced"

and i just got to wake up
and realise there isnt much time left on the counter for me
its hectic i know, yet i dont have any inkling to decide where to commence

its frustrating... but i hope its just a short term effect


tears were shed for many reasons
for myself and for others
in many places more often than one
the inadequacy shows
how useful am i really?
remains a question unknown...

And I realized...
+ + +